Perspective of gratitude
Perspective is everything. In this blog post, I will share with you the importance of not being shocked when challenging things happen. Remember, that life is happening for you, not to you and that there is a gift in everything. It’s important to celebrate the gifts and especially those that come from a hard situation. I do this, by sharing the story of how we had 17,000 stolen from our house, how we processed that and how we were able to find the silver lining. Here are the three steps so that you can do it too.
1. injustice happens,
2. Look for the gift,
3. Celebrate the gift.
The hope is to get real with the way life can be sometimes, how to change your perspective and look until you find the gifts. The more you look and find the gifts in life, the more you get to celebrate them even more. You will learn that how we see things, is literally the difference of suffering for years, or shrugging your shoulders and saying, “oh well”.
We've all heard the phrase "Perspective is everything". And that's because it is. How you see things determines how you feel about things, which determine your actions on what's going to happen next. It's amazing when you change your perspective. You change your life when you don't take the first programmed thought. Then you can separate yourself from that and you can say, "Wait a second. What is true? What else could be true?"
It changes everything. We had a situation one day... My son calls me and the sound in his voice, I will never forget. "Mom, we've been robbed." And I was like, "What?" And he goes, "Yeah, someone came into the house and it's all a mess and the safe is destroyed."With my heart pounding I said "Okay, I'm coming home". Someone came in on a Sunday, it was Mother's Day, actually. They came knowing that I was at work, this person knew our life. Tate was playing the drums downstairs. So he was making a bunch of noise and so this person went upstairs, knew my house intimately and bashed the safe with a hammer. The only reason they really got away with it was because Tate was playing the drums. They stole $17,000 from my safe.
I don't usually have $17,000 in my house, I know better than that. However, it was there because I was taking it to a single mom that needed help. I had talked to Source and came to the thought that the next big sale I get, I wanted all of the commission to go to this mom in need. So I did. I got a large sale, and that was the commission, $17,000. I was so excited. I was about to fly up to the San Diego area to deliver the money and that's why it was in my safe. The violation I felt …. if you've ever been robbed, ..... it's not fun. Not fun to know that someone came into your space, unwanted, and destroyed some things and stole some things. You don't feel safe.
So the boys and I, we changed our perspective. We looked at what was still left. “The passports are here. That's amazing. The credit cards are here. That's awesome. Most of our clothes are here. Yay!”. And we realized that all that was taken was the money and a few little things, that we were fine. We were shook up especially knowing that it happened right under our noses. But we were fine. What I wanted to do was make sure the boys weren't traumatized, I didn't want their perspective to be. "We've been violated. We're unsafe. This could happen at any time again." No, I wanted to change our perspective to that of gratitude.
So I took them out for dinner, I said okay, let's go celebrate. Celebrate that we're okay, because somebody could have gotten hurt, nobody got hurt, and that's the most important thing. So we went to this teppanyaki restaurant. We sit down, and the chef comes to the table. This is a restaurant where they make the meal on a grill right in front of you. He starts clicking the utensils together, setting onion rings on fire and throwing things in the air and catching them in his hat. It was a really nice show. Then at one point, he says “so are you celebrating anything today?”
I responded, "Yes Actually. ." he goes, What are you celebrating? And the boys looked at me and I said, "We're celebrating that we got robbed today and we're all okay." He froze, he completely stopped what he was doing. And he looked at us, and the boys looked at me, and I looked at the boys and back at him. The kids were a little uncomfortable, but we were all smiling. "Yeah, we got robbed today, and we're okay, and that's an amazing thing."
The beautiful thing is, I was thankful that I had the wherewithal to be able to change our perspective, so that incident didn't become a big thing but instead ended up being a little speed bump. And why was it a speed bump? Because we changed our perspective. Everything works out, remember, life's happening for us, there's a gift in everything. Turns out the money that was stollen wouldn't have been used in the best way. She wasn't ready for it. And that became obvious shortly thereafter. So everything worked out. We learned a very valuable lesson that day on how to change our perspective. How to find the gift. We had a beautiful evening together, and we don't have any trauma stored in our body because of it. Yay!
How you can learn from me…
Step 1. injustice happens
The importance of this step is to stop being shocked when hard/challenging things happen.
I do this step by sharing a story about how we had 17,000 stolen from our house that was meant for a woman who I felt needed it.
Here’s how you do it…
A. Shit happens
The first step is to realize that shit happens. Period. Sometimes things don’t go the way we planned. Period. Repeat after me, “ shit happens, so what!” Again. “Shit happens so what!” When we got robbed I had this realization. Shit happens, people get desperate, so what. Say it with me one more time. “Shit happens, so what.” That’s step one, it should take you 30 seconds or less to complete.
B. Stop being shocked and appalled by it
The second step is to stop being shocked and appalled by the fact that shit happens. Remember that what we think is shit is really a gift tied up in a pretty bow, if we look for it. But seriously, we need as a human race to stop being shocked that this world of 7.5 Billion people, doesn’t spin in just the way that we’d like. That’s the same as expecting your one-year-old baby to go from crawling to walking in one big leap. No they fall down, they learn, and they fall down again. There are billions of humans falling down and getting back up at different stages. Of course it’s an imperfect world. Step two, is to stop being shocked and surprised that we live in an imperfect world.
C. Accept it
The third step is to accept that we live in an imperfect world. Or as I like to say, a perfectly imperfect world. It’s one thing to know it, it’s a completely other thing to accept it. I fought for years against my preference to have most things go the way I wanted them to go. For example, a husband should be loving and kind, truth is not always. My boys should have a dad that loves them, truth is they didn’t. At least their birth dad did not, he was not capable of love, but their step dad does love them. We have preferences and expectations that everyone we touch or are around should be awesome, always. It’s simply not true. We are all messy humans and glorious, the sooner we accept that the faster we find joy. Repeat after me, “ I accept that we are all messy and glorious humans!” again. “ I accept that we are all messy and glorious humans” one last time and smile as you say it. “ I accept that we are all messy and glorious humans” This will take 30 sec to complete.
The outcome of this step is to get real with the way life can be sometimes.
2. Look for the gift
The importance of this step is to remember again that life is happening for you, not to you and that there is a gift in everything.
I do this step by sharing the story of taking inventory on what wasn't taken, that we were ok, all the gifts.
Here’s what you do…
A. Ask Yourself " What good has happened in this situation?"
Breathe deep into the lungs. Make sure it’s through your nose, hold for 5 seconds and exhale through your mouth making the sound “ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”. The first step in remembering that life is happening for you and that there is a gift in everything is to think of a situation that was hard for you to go through, then ask your higher self the question, “What good has happened from this situation?" Write down anything that comes to mind. For us we saw that we were ok, most of the house was still intact, and passports and credit cards were still there, “What good has happened from your situation?" This will take 3-5 min.
B. Ask Yourself " How could it have been worse?"
The second step is to ask your higher self, " How could it have been worse?" and write down anything that comes to mind. For us it could have been where the kids who were home alone could have gotten hurt, the robber could have stolen the passports and ran up the credit cards etc. It could have been much much worse. Ask yourself " How could it have been worse?" Write down your answers. This will take 3-5 min.
C. Ask yourself some more " What other gifts are there because of this?"
The third step is to anchor in even more the blessing and the gifts of the situation in question by asking this question. " What other gifts are there, because of this?" For me the biggest blessing was being able to teach the kids to find gifts in even the hard things. " What other gifts have you discovered because of your situation?” This will take 3-5 min to complete.
The outcome of this step is to look until you find the gifts
3. Celebrate the gift
The importance of this step is to celebrate gifts and especially those that come from a hard situation
I do this step by sharing the story of taking the kids to Tapanaki and the chef asking if we were celebrating anything and that we responded " Yes actually, we were robbed today!"
Here’s how you do it…
A. Congratulate yourself in finding the gift in the situation
Once you have found the gifts, it’s time to celebrate! Why? Because the normal current program that runs is that we would be a victim. In the normal current program, I might have felt scared and violated, I might have had trouble sleeping after that, I might have told anyone who would listen about the 17,000 that was stolen right from under our very noses while the kids were home! OMG! Or, you can do it differently and celebrate the gifts. So honor yourself right now, that you were able to look at a hard situation differently and find the good! That’s amazing!
B. Go out with family or friends to celebrate that.
I suggest you celebrate in style. Make it something you will remember more than the situation itself. Go out with friends, tell them why you are celebrating. They may think you are weird like our chef, but who cares. It helps people reframe situations. It gives people permission to celebrate the next time something difficult happens to them rather than rolling around in misery. What will you do now to celebrate? Write down what you want to do. Now schedule it. Don’t delay. Celebrate ASAP and enjoy!
C. This reprograms the mind to appreciate the challenges in life instead of becoming a victim
Why is this so important? Because you have to reprogram your mind if you want to have a different result in your life. Transformation requires doing things differently! Celebrating the gifts that have come out of a tough situation reprograms the mind to appreciate the challenges in life instead of becoming a victim. Think about working out at the gym. You have to lift weights to get strong, sometime those weights cause your muscles to hurt because in order to build muscle you have to tear it down in order to get built up. It’s the same in life. We have to lift weights in life to get strong. So why are we cursing the weights that make us strong in our lives. What if we had the attitude of, “ Ok, I’ve got this! This will make me stronger!” Keep it up and you might just transform your life!
The more you look and find the gifts in life, the more you get to celebrate them even more.
When you follow and implement these steps you will know that perspective is everything. The importance of not being shocked when hard/challenging things happen. That life is happening for you, not to you and that there is a gift in everything. You will know the importance of celebrating the gifts and especially those that come from a hard situation. Like in the story of how we had 17,000 stolen from our house, how we processed that and how we were able to find the silver lining. These are the three steps so that you can do it too.
1. injustice happens,
2. Look for the gift,
3. Celebrate the gift.
The hope is to get real with the way life can be sometimes, how to change your perspective and look until you find the gifts. The more you look and find the gifts in life, the more you get to celebrate them even more. You will learn that, how we see things, is literally the difference between suffering for years, or shrugging your shoulders and saying, “oh well”. Which do you prefer?
Your Action Steps: Are to implement the steps above, and come back and let us know what your results are!
READ the whole story http://www.getyourshittogether.life